Topic: Presidential Campaign 2008
Ron Paul: The Best Grand Wizard in America's History Just say the Magic Words.by John Armstrong
(Libertarian)
Thursday, January 17, 2008
After watching more debates and reading more articles over the last few months than I have in the rest of my life combined, I think I finally figured it out. It's laughably simple once you get it. It's like a simple card trick that seems mystifying when you don't understand how it works. Yet anyone with two hands, and most anyone with one, could do it if they knew how.
The problem is getting someone who understands the trick to tell you how it works. Luckily for any aspiring magician, the internet has made the secrets that were once guarded as closely as Fort Knox accessible to anyone who wishes to find them.
Just as the internet has enlightened many a young magician, it has now exposed a great secret of Presidential politics for any voter who wants to find it. This secret isn't a card trick, but it is a magical phrase. Since 1965, this magical phrase has been uttered publicly exactly once every four years. The Washington Wizards, not the NBA team--the politicians, would have you believe that the magical phrase is the issue du jour: Communists, Nukes, The Economy, Social Security, Healthcare, Terrorism, Change, and the all time favorite: The Children. Since the real magical phrase is said so rarely and the Wizards have become so skillful in disguising it, the common person can't really be blamed for forgetting what the magical phrase really is or for not understanding its significance.
If the people knew the magical phrase and understood its profound implications, there would be only one question asked in the debates, everyone in the nation would watch, and choosing a candidate would be as simple as pulling a quarter out of a four year old's ear.
The question would be:
How do we know we can count on you to do the Real Job of President?
What is the Real Job? It's the magic phrase. The one that will be chanted and then forgotten by the people and by the Wizard who can sell more tickets by misdirecting the public and keeping us in the dark. In fact, almost as soon the real magical phrase is repeated (since it's repeated, I suppose technically it's said twice every four years) the new Grand Wizard gives a long speech full of misdirection incantations meant to obscure the true magical phrase and hypnotize the public.
But the internet has unlocked it for us Muggles (if you haven't read Harry Potter--that means non-magical folk). In case you miss it next January 20, 2009 and don't want to wait until 2013 to hear it again, here it is in its entirety:
"I do solemnly swear that I will faithfully execute the office of President of the United States, and will to the best of my ability, preserve, protect and defend the Constitution of the United States."
How would Ron Paul answer the only question that matters?
The best predictor of future success is past performance. You know you can count on me to do the Real Job because, as my past performance in Congress shows, that is Exactly what I have done for the last 30 Years.
Do you understand now why the other wizards and their assistants in the media despise Ron Paul? He's practically screaming the magical phrase for everyone to hear free of charge. It's the Constitution, Stupid! The People's Contract With America.
If the masses all knew the secret magical phrase, this would be the biggest landslide election in history and the charismatic enchanters who have ruled our country for over a century would have to find a new line of work.
Here's the funny thing about the real magic words: they are so powerful, most of the problems we are currently facing would disappear like a card into a magician's sleeve if the wizards would keep their word and do the only job they swear they will.
The other wizards and their minions would have you believe that Ron Paul would be a wonderful Grand Wizard of a different sort, but the people who have woken up from their hypnotic sleep know how the trick works and aren't fooled anymore. And we agree that he would be an incredible Grand Wizard: not the leader of the KKK, the leader of U.S.A.
For the non rhyming and metaphorically challenged among you I'll put it a different way, Ron Paul is the only candidate on whom you can rely do the Real Job. The Job one person swears in to do once every four years by repeating the magical words found in the Presidential Oath of Office. The Job is popularly known as:
President of the United States of America.
This may break your hearts, but Gandalf and Dumbledore aren't real. Our President should be. Of course you could just cross your fingers, rub your rabbit's foot, put on your lucky sweater, get hypnotized by your television, and pick the candidate who promises to make all of your problems disappear. This is still a somewhat (at least for now) free country so that is your right. After all, it is kinda fun to believe in magic. But the longer you believe, the more of a letdown it is when you finally learn how ridiculously simple the trick is and how gullible you were to have ever believed. At the count of three; I'm going to snap my fingers. Wake up if you choose. Or just keep getting distracted by the pretty assistant, handing over your money, and wondering why the only "change" that happens needs always to be "changed" again four-eight years later.
Your Fellow American,
John Armstrong
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Posted By: John Armstrong
Date: 2008-01-16 23:45:54
Uh, Q, that's the point. It's a play on words meant to draw attention to the article so they can learn something. And the term is relevant to the article. Read it.
Please leave the title of this article, Why? Becuase it draws in the nay sayers, and those who hate Dr. Ron Paul....THey think it's something that will give them more ammo in their already empty guns... Some dirt perhaps to kick up on the good Dr. Paul...
I think the title of this article is damn ingenius...
maybe you could think of a few more that sound nasty but actually bring it to the front that
Posted By: Richard Wicks
Date: 2008-01-17 00:47:49
The article is basically true. There's only one guy that you can vote for this time around that pretty much won't break his oath to the constitution. Point that out to people, and they might just realize this man is our only choice. Everybody else is lying on the first day they enter office.
Posted By: John Armstrong
Date: 2008-01-17 00:53:40
Joan,
When you are commenting on something I write, you never have to say "Sorry!!!" My putting stuff like this in the public domain makes me subject to any opinion, good or bad. I can handle it. More importantly, I fully support your right to freely express your opinions which is why I started writing here to begin with.
I agree that this particular article is a little twisted and sick as well, it just kinda came to my sick and twisted mind. To use another analogy and carry on the metaphor and that has probably gone too far already, the sick in twisted nature of this article when compared to our sick and twisted government is about as gruesome as a woman sawed in half by a magician compared to a soldier blown in half in Iraq.
Good read. And I like the tactical aspect; attract the readers and educate them. I don't see the "twisted and sick" part, but that may be a matter of opinion.
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